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“I already can’t wait for you to come back even tho you haven’t left yet”

I remember the first time you took my hand,

it was a sunny afternoon in a small city park;

we stood up and yours just slipped into mine –

behaving like it was the most natural thing.


I remember the first time my fingertips run down your back,

following the architecture of your muscles;

I closed my eyes and traced your tattoo –

trying to imprint your skin into my mind.


I remember the first time I felt that energy flowing,

it was late night or early morning, and we were crashing bars;

you disclosed your desires to me –

saying I would have probably needed to know.


I remember the first time I was afraid to lose you,

days were too much, and you needed space;

I searched your profile and smelled you in crowds –

waiting for the world to stop spinning.


I scratch obsessively my body and
I eliminate stubbornly my cells and
I occupy constantly my mind and
I drown emotionlessly my feelings in
the last desperate attempt to forget you,

[I already have forgiven you,
it wasn’t difficult, my dear, you were
my dawn – a glorious morning

to lessen the physical surface
that has ever been in contact with you
– undoubtedly,
a lifetime wouldn’t be enough for my nerves
to forget the pressure of your fingertips.