I’m horrible at taking risks and starting conversations,

but no, that’s not true.

I’m excellent at taking risks but awful at taking the consequences,

and I’m good, so good, so fucking

good at running running running away.

 

I’m great at starting conversations, being quirky, funny and entertaining.

But just in drops.

In particles.

 

I do not know how to talk to you.

To keep smiling.

To keep be interesting, being mysterious, shining, bright and big

 

Eventually I will show up. Eventually

you will notice it under my skin, translucent,

violent, crushing out, scraping, ripping, lacerating

the surface, screaming vomiting, rotten, black,

big huge invading corroding.

Eventually you will notice it

 

And I will run.

 

I will run run run run run run run run run

Escaping from you

 

and escaping from me.

but it will catch up

 

always